Common Parenting Mistakes to Avoid in a Divorce

Illinois family lawyerDivorce can be difficult for children. Living in two households, watching parents date and remarry, and getting introduced to step-siblings and half-siblings are several of the many changes divorce can bring to your children’s lives.

Fortunately, there are ways you can help your children live a high quality of life despite any changes your divorce may bring. You can start by making an effort to avoid the following 4 common parenting mistakes during divorce:

1. Forcing Your Children to Be Messengers

If you have a tough time being civil to your ex, you may be tempted to communicate with them through your children. When you do this, you put your children in the middle and show them that there is still conflict between you and your ex. Rather than asking your children to convey a message to their other parent, work up the maturity to communicate with them on your own. If you do not want to speak to them in person or via phone, you can email them, text them, or write them a note.

2. Not Discussing Divorce with Your Children

Sometimes, parents make the mistake of never discussing their divorce with their children. Although you may think this will protect them, it can actually create anxiety, frustration, and feelings of loneliness. Rather than staying away from the divorce discussion altogether, explain to your child what is happening and how it will affect their life. Allow them to ask you questions and express their feelings.

3. Oversharing About Your Divorce

On the other hand, sharing too much information about your divorce with your children can do more harm than good. Refrain from discussing court hearings or sharing any divorce-related documents with their life. When you are discussing personal divorce-related matters that are inappropriate for children to hear, be sure you are in a private place where they cannot hear you.

4. Fighting and Arguing in Front of Your Children

It may be challenging for some divorced parents to hold their composure and refrain from fighting and arguing in front of their children. If your marriage ended on bad terms and you cannot be civil to your spouse, you should do your best to avoid fighting in arguing with them in front of your children. If you do, they will likely become stressed out and put into an uncomfortable position.

Contact an Experienced DuPage County Divorce Attorney

If you would like further information on how to parent properly during a divorce, we encourage you to reach out to our experienced Hinsdale divorce attorneys. Call us today at 630-920-8855.


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