How many classes did you take in school, as a child and as a young adult, in which you learned things that were not directly useful in the real world? And how many of us have actually taken classes on how to get along with one another or how to resolve conflicts with another person?
I'll bet the answer is almost none.
I am often asked, "What is the most frequent cause of divorce?" My answer is that the parties have no ability to resolve conflicts, issues, or problems between themselves. The reason for this, I believe, is that few of us have ever been educated to resolve conflict.
Classes or training to resolve arguments or conflicts with another person are not offered by our educational systems. And yet, when you are able to resolve conflict you can then deal with the various issues of marriage including child rearing, finances, and differing goals. In order to have a successful marriage, conflict resolution is probably the main skill that would result in a long and happy marriage.
However, there is hope when a marriage fails. You and your children do not need to go through an Illinois divorce alone. Many counties in Illinois offer programs and services to assist divorcing families with children. DuPage County, Illinois offers children in divorcing families the opportunity to use free services, for the most part, through the DuPage County Family Center.
Services Offered in DuPage County, Illinois
Mediation: DuPage County, through their Family Center, offers confidential mediation through a neutral third-party who is trained as a mediator to resolve visitation or parenting time conflicts between parents.
Mutual Exchange: DuPage County provides a safe, child-friendly location where children can be picked up and dropped off so that visitation or parenting times can take place without conflict. This is particularly valuable when the parents are at odds with one another or there is fear on the part of one or both parents that there may be physical or mental abuse at the time the children are transferred between parents.
Parent Education: DuPage County offers a classroom setting or online services to comply with the mandatory four hour seminar that parents must attend in order to satisfy the local rule. Classes can also be taken in Spanish, Español.
Parenting Resources: DuPage County offers references to books and websites as well as resource handouts to assist parents in coping with their divorce and problems affecting their children.
PEACE Program: This program is a conflict management group for high conflict parents and involves role-playing, skill training, peer coaching, and supervised practice to enable parents to use appropriate communications to resolve conflicts within the family and with their children. The program is comprised of two hour sessions that occur once per week for eight weeks.
Supervised Parenting Time: When the court has ordered, or the parties agree, that one parent's parenting time with the children will be supervised, DuPage County provides a safe, conflict free and neutral environment for the parenting time to occur.
Transitional Exchange Program: When visitation schedules are changed from one type to another, the movement of the children from one parent to another can be facilitated by the family center staff so that no contact occurs between the parents. The program builds in additional time and staff involvement to help the family complete and adapt to the new schedule. When ordered by family law judges, the program can provide a written observation report. This is not a long-term solution to the family's problems but rather is designed as a short-term program and lasts approximately three months.
The DuPage County website outlines these services and offers a wealth of information regarding other community services offered by DuPage County for families and seniors. Volunteers can also participate in helping the community.
If your marriage is beyond repair and you would like more information regarding your Illinois divorce options, please contact one our of compassionate DuPage County divorce attorneys today. At the Law Office of Martoccio & Martoccio, we serve clients in Chicago and throughout the western suburbs.