Moving Past the Pain of Divorce

pain of divorceWhen you are going through divorce, you will likely experience an extreme range of emotions, especially during the first several months. It is not uncommon for a person going through divorce to unexpectedly and completely lose control of his or her emotions — scenarios in which either you or the other person move on can be some of the most devastating psycho-social traumas an adult can experience. This can be true even for people who were expected or looking forward to divorce as a way to end or leave a bad or unhealthy marriage.

Divorce is consistently rated as one of the top three stressful things that an adult can experience, second only to the death of a spouse or a child. This is, in some respects, because divorce is the death of love and promise. It is the death of what you had planned for your future and the beginning of a life that you may or may not have chosen to lead alone.

If you are going through divorce, there are several things you can do to help mitigate the emotional trauma. While it may seem a colder and less personal part of the process, working with a family law attorney can actually help you to deal with the emotional fallout of marital dissolution because it lessens the stress — knowing that someone is working in your best interest can lessen the burden of the many complicated steps you have to take.

Joining a support group can be a great way to help yourself through the emotional fallout. If you have other friends who are divorced or who are also going through it, spending time with them can help you to see light at the end of the tunnel and set the groundwork for your new independent life. There is no “right” way to grieve, however. Allowing yourself to let go of the anger and fear that comes with the end of marriage is a good first step, but rather than trying to fight the pain, allowing yourself to grieve can often be the first move toward moving on.

If you or someone you know is facing divorce, the most important step is to seek legal counsel. Do not go through it alone. Contact an experienced DuPage County divorce attorney today.


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