The word divorce is often associated with short marriages that were the result of a spontaneous weekend but truthfully, a marriage of any length can end in divorce. When a couple gets divorced after a long marriage, they will likely face issues that may not be present when a couple divorces after only being married for a short time. Below are the three most common issues that come up in divorce cases when a couple has been married for a long time.

Complex Property Division Issues

Property division is a complex issue in any divorce, but the matter becomes particularly complicated when the couple has been married for a long time. Property division relies on dividing marital property between separate property, and this is difficult after a long marriage. Over time, a couple’s separate property is likely to become commingled in joint bank accounts, meaning it may be subject to property division rules, even though it is separate property.

Other property division matters also become more complicated when a couple has been married for a long time. For example, both spouses may have accumulated savings in retirement accounts, and these must also be divided. If the spouses have an estate plan, it is also important to change these, as it is likely that the spouses named each other as beneficiaries.

On March 20, 2020, Governor J.B. Pritzker issued a statewide shelter-in-place order. The order was intended to slow the spread of COVID-19 and keep people safe in their own homes. Although the order may have saved lives and helped Illinois flatten the curve, for others, the news was not good. These are the individuals that are victims of domestic violence. For many of these victims, the only relief they had from the threat of abuse prior to the pandemic was when they went to work, or when their abuser did. It was not long before Chicago, and many other areas, saw an increase in domestic violence. Below are a few of the factors that place victims at greater risk during the pandemic.

The Feeling of Isolation

Abusers typically want to isolate their victim from their workplace, friends, and family members. Through this isolation, the abuser can use gaslighting techniques on their victims and are more easily able to control them. With social isolation mandated by the government, it became easier to isolate victims of domestic violence, which can trigger future incidents.

Stress

The novel coronavirus brought an unknown threat to Illinois and the rest of the United States. The unknown is extremely stressful, particularly when people are unsure of how the virus spreads, how to contain it, and how to protect loved ones. When abusers become stressed, they commonly take it out on their victims, particularly when each person is forced to remain in the same household.

Divorce can make people act in ways they otherwise would have never even considered. In a few cases, one spouse will stalk their partner in order to intimidate them, learn information that could help their case, such as if the spouse is having an affair, or to try and get their partner to meet their demands. Stalking can involve a number of different behaviors. No matter the type of stalking one is engaging in, it is very threatening and there are steps you can take to stop it if it is happening during your divorce.

What Is Stalking?

According to the Stalking No Contact Order Act in Illinois, stalking typically involves surveilling a person, regularly appearing at their home, school, or work, making unwanted phone calls, or sending unwanted emails, texts, or messages over social media. Injuring a pet, leaving items for a person, and vandalizing another person’s property are also all considered forms of stalking.

It is important to note that no matter the type of behavior, stalking is usually done repeatedly and is not a single act. Usually, it also involves placing the victim in fear of being hurt, and sometimes stalkers do physically hurt their victims. No one should ever think that they are overreacting to their spouse stalking them, and everyone should know what to do when in this situation.

Sometimes a person that is married wants out of the relationship, but they do not want to get a divorce. In some cases, a person’s religious beliefs prevent them from getting a divorce, but there are many reasons a person may wish to annul their marriage. Although annulments are granted in Illinois courts, this method of dissolving a marriage has specific requirements and when those are not met, a couple must go through the divorce process to end their marriage. Although the process of annulling a marriage is vastly different from the divorce process, anyone wishing to obtain an annulment should still speak to an Illinois family lawyer.

The Difference Between Divorce and Annulment

Many people think that divorce and annulment both mean the same thing because each of these terms refers to the end of a marriage. However, they do each have their differences.

When a couple gets an annulment, it is as though the marriage never happened because it was not legal in the first place. It is for this reason that an annulment is known as a “Declaration of Invalidity Marriage” under Illinois law.

Not all divorces end up going through a lengthy courtroom battle. In many cases, a couple may choose to enter mediation for their divorce, as it holds many benefits. During mediation, a neutral third-party mediator meets with both spouses and attempts to foster compromise so the two parties can come to a divorce settlement on their own, outside of the courtroom.

Mediation is typically less expensive and less time-consuming than other types of divorces and each spouse is generally more likely to follow the provisions outlined in the agreement. However, if you are considering mediation, preparation is still important to ensure you get the most out of it.

Remain Willing to Cooperate

Mediation is very effective, but only when the two parties are willing to cooperate with each other. Mediation works best when you can identify your mutual interests with your spouse, and be willing to resolve your differences in a way that is satisfactory to each of you. If you are determined to remain adversarial or are unwilling to bend on every term of the divorce, mediation likely is not for you.