Will “Nesting” Work for You?

It may have been the reality show John & Kate Plus 8 that thrust the term nesting back into the spotlight, and although it appeared to work well for the TV couple, it isn't something that is right for every couple who is considering divorce. Opponents of this type of custody arrangement say that it doesn't usually work well because it can be very expensive. But, for many couples, although it takes an adjustment, it can work.

Nesting, or bird's nest custody, is where the parents move in and out of the original home rather than the children moving back and forth between the parents' new residences. In traditional custody arrangements with joint custody, the children are may be expected to live with one parent during the week and the other on the weekends, or a similar arrangement that is determined in the divorce suit. Advocates of nesting say that it gives the parents the opportunity to be in the child's shoes. In addition, nesting, according to scientific lecture, may offer many benefits to helping children adjust during a divorce.

This type of arrangement may work best with divorcing couples who part on more civilized terms, as a certain level of openness and respect for ones space and things will increase success. Children should also be included in the decision, and open communication will help prevent and resolve misunderstanding should they arise.

Still, with the best intentions, nesting may be difficult in practice and courts rarely order this type of custody arrangement. There is the matter of maintaining the marital house, privacy issues and issues surrounding dating and having company over.

Nesting takes into consideration what is best for the children. For those parents who feel it is important to maintain as much normalcy as possible, this custody option may be worth considering. If you have questions about divorce or nesting in Illinois, contact family law attorneys who care.

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