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There are many different reasons people file for divorce. Whatever the reasoning is for yours, it is important to avoid certain mistakes that could jeopardize your emotional well-being or even your legal rights. Although the divorce process is often harrowing for those involved, below are the five biggest mistakes you want to avoid when going through yours.
You and your spouse may wish to come to an agreement about the terms of the divorce, whether you do it on your own or with the help of an attorney or mediator. No matter how this agreement is reached, it is important that you never use the kids as bargaining chips. For example, promising your spouse more parenting time with the children in exchange for additional property or alimony should never be done. It will only make the children feel devalued and will make the process so much more difficult for them. Although there will likely be negotiating in your divorce, your kids should never be in the middle of it.
It is always better for the entire family if the two spouses can come to an amicable agreement on the terms of their divorce. However, do not settle for simply orally agreeing to the terms. There is a chance that could backfire and that your spouse will one day go back on their word. Always get agreements in writing and create a legal contract that can be taken to a judge in case your spouse decides one day to no longer play by the rules you both set out.
Some spouses hide assets and other financial information during a divorce because they do not want them to be a part of property division. This is a big mistake. Your spouse will likely have lawyers and investigators that will uncover the assets anyway. Once they do, a judge may even hold it against you that you tried to hide things from your spouse and the court and may award your spouse more for your actions.
It is natural when going through a divorce to feel angry and frustrated about your spouse, but you should never reveal these feelings to your kids, either during or after the divorce. When someone talks badly about a child’s parent, that child feels as though a part of them is also being put down. You certainly do not mean this to happen, but the fact is that your child will feel that way anyway. Remain civil with your spouse and, if you cannot say anything nice about them, do not say anything at all.
You may be tempted to try and file your divorce on your own, particularly if you are getting advice from friends or family members that have been through it. However, while a good support network can help you get through the divorce emotionally, this support should never be mistaken for legal advice. Only a skilled Hinsdale divorce lawyer can provide that. If you are considering divorce, contact our experienced attorneys at the Law Office of Martoccio & Martoccio. We will walk you through the entire process, negotiate with the other side, and help you secure the settlement you deserve. Call us today at 630-920-8855 or contact us online to schedule your free consultation.