At that time there was no Illinois divorce law on the subject of pet “custody.” Nonetheless, later in my career, I argued for custody of a dog’s ashes which were in an urn on the divorcing couples’ fireplace mantel. Again, I argued in both cases that the family dog was like a child or family member to my client. I knew that for many, a Pet becomes a best friend and a true member of the family. In both cases, I incurred the ire of the Judge who was not pleased with having the Judge’s time wasted. By the way, a good divorce lawyer will think first about his or her client’s beliefs and argue for them and only second about any potential waste of the Court’s time.

In March 2014, I wrote a blog and posted it here on our website entitled: Who Gets the Dog in an Illinois Divorce? The answer then being, that the dog was treated like any other property in an Illinois Divorce and divided according to the rules of marital versus nonmarital property with no recognition as to how important that Pet was to the client.

Physicist Andres Gomberoff believes that science can help resolve child custody arrangement questions. Gomberoff, who has two ex-wives and a current girlfriend, was searching for a way to optimize time with children while still allowing for alone time.

Bigger and blended families may be stuck juggling a variety of schedules that don’t make the most sense for any of the parents or the children. To find the best visit schedule, Gomberoff applied the same process that is used to minimize magnetic material in a spin-glass system.

Gomberoff recruited friends in an effort to use mathematics and physics to see whether there was an optimal approach to generating visitation schedules. They used examples from a network of friends who had children and exes. While he and his team discovered that there was no way to satisfy every parent, applying physics did help to reduce the number of unhappy couples. In their research, the team found an algorithm that allows every parent all of their own children on the same weekends.

Free speech versus privacy rights? It sounds like shouting match between two talking heads on Bill O'Riley's television show, doesn't it?

Surprisingly, however, revenge websites and "revenge porn" is just one of the newest conflict areas where people post sexually explicit pictures of their soon-to-be exes, boyfriends, girlfriends and just friends on the Internet (see my last blog on this topic).

Now websites that encourage revenge " postings" not necessarily "porn" have taken root, these revenge websites have been used as a form of extortion. Your soon-to-be ex spouse, ex boyfriend or girlfriend posts a picture of you with humiliating and shameful comments about you.

If you are not married to the mother of your child in Illinois, you have a right to establish in court that you are the legal father of your child or prove paternity. It is important to do so since the mother can stop your visits with your child anytime unless there is a court order setting court-mandated child visitation rights for you.

Also, establishing your paternity of your child lets your child know that you cared enough to take the legal steps to be recognized as his or her parent. This knowledge will stay with your child throughout the his or her life.

Give Them a Better Life

Divorce isn’t easy. It’s rarely kind, and more often than not emotions of hurt, disappointment, and anger surface in an ugly way. The idea that you could keep your divorce amiable by attempting to stifle these emotions may be too simplistic, but, according to the Huffington Post, there are some easy things you can do to keep your divorce from heading deep into the abyss of irreconcilability. These are especially important tips if you’re divorcing from a partner with whom you have children—it may sound cliché, but allowing your children to keep a healthy relationship with your ex is crucial to their development, as well as your sanity. Specifically in situations where you have full custody, the better the relationship between your kids and your ex, the more apt you are to get some time for yourself every once in a while. 

The first piece of advice that the Huffington Post gives to keep your divorce amiable is to resist complaining about your ex. “How can you possibly move forward in a productive and positive manner if you are living in the past? If you think your friends want to hear your incessant complaints about the ex, you are sorely mistaken,” reports the Huffington Post. Instead of complaining, the article suggests, try doing 20 squats (or push-ups or sit-ups) every time you feel the urge to complain.

Also try to avoid keeping score, or keeping “tabs on everything,” suggests the Huffington Post. According to the article, “life isn’t about keeping score, it’s about kindness and love to one another.” Try to keep your attitude up even if you’re not feeling happy and lucky deep down—the more you practice positivity in every small situation, the more positive of a person you’ll be.