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Whether you had suspicions that it was happening or you discovered proof out of the blue, infidelity hurts. Different people have varying opinions on whether it is possible to overcome infidelity in a marriage, but there are some tips that can help you process what’s happened and feel more confident about your next steps. Relying on your support network and talking through your own feelings about the issue can be very helpful. Deciding to separate or divorce might the right choice for you.
According to the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy, 15 percent of wives and 25 percent of husbands have admitted to infidelity during their marriage. Although some couples are able to work through the issues related to the infidelity, either on their own or with professional help, for other spouses the violation of trust is simply too much. Whether you decide to stay or determine it’s time to go, you’ll need to be prepared to work through the emotions associated with being a victim of infidelity.
New York couples’ therapist Dr. Jamie Turndorf suggests the first step is stopping the affair. If the affair will not stop, this is a sure sign that you need to consider your legal options. The person who is betrayed should be in charge of taking whatever time is needed for the recovery.
It is possible that you might want to try to work towards a solution, only to feel weeks or months later like you are simply not ready to forgive and move on. Do not feel rushed or pressured to make a decision, and you shouldn’t take it out on yourself if your attempts to resolve the underlying issues do not work out.
Take some time for yourself and consider talking through the emotional challenges with friends, support network members, or even professional counselors in your area. If you would like legal advice on taking the next step with a separation or divorce, contact the offices of an experienced Illinois divorce attorney today.